No use watering flowers that have already died!


But then on the other hand, a few rare relationships are made for keeping.These relationships are built to last for a lifetime, or more. These relationships are worth going the extra mile for, and all the blood, sweat and tears that are suffered along the way.

But how can you tell whether you have a relationship worth keeping or letting go of? Well, only you can answer that question in the depths of your heart.

One of the biggest reasons why relationships falter is because we begin to take the other person for granted. Don’t take your partner’s effort and love for granted. Live every day like it might be their last day on earth (and it might). Say “thank you” every time they do something thoughtful and ensure that you express your gratitude through physical affection, or an equally generous deed.

Something tragic I observed through life  in bitter couples (especially old ones) is that they rarely make eye contact anymore. Life between these couples takes on a robotic, mindless, habituated tone. What’s the point of being together if you don’t take the time to look at, or even touch, each other (other than through sex)?

For many couples shutting off any inner vulnerability is the easiest path because it doesn’t require the pain of courage. When we are uncomfortable with ourselves, we are uncomfortable with letting other people in. 

Remember those crazy, love-drenched early days? Remember all the spontaneous things you did together? Through time it was natural for you to drift apart as your responsibilities accumulated. But don’t let that crush you. Get away from humdrum life for a while and do something extraordinary! Learn to rock climb, go out to a new part of town, buy each other strange presents, get a ticket to the opera. Do something that you will both enjoy, forcing you out of your habits.

What I’ve learnt is this: There is no joy in attempting to save a one sided journey… if the person you walked with has chosen to stop loving you then it’s time to stop watering those flowers… they have died and need to be removed from your garden of love…

we all know the storms of life can sometimes wreak havoc in relationships, and those that started on the basis of supporting a soul through trauma are the hardest to settle into loving balance…

I’ve read many posts or blogs or books that say stay away from people in trauma… but if I’d listened to them I’d never have given the other soul who needed love and support any! And she deserved love and support and understanding…

All people need love, all people go through trauma, all people deal with or face their trauma based on their life experiences… to be judged for this whilst not judging opens a mirrored of questions.. I realised that what I’d given was priceless but when the time came to have my own trauma understood it was lost in the opinions and judgement of others… people I’d never met, and more importantly didn’t have a ounce of spiritual energy..

there is no point in watering those flowers – they have died! You can’t save a relationship that has opinions of others saturating it, people who do not know or understand your trauma…

But a few rare relationships are made for keeping… those need to be pruned, nurtured and grown! 

Author: Only One, But a lion!

Only One; But A Lion! Writer, blogger and explorer of life... Writer, blogger and explorer of humanity-single dad-story teller-giver of hugs... wiper of tears- I am imperfect.. but hope is eternal 💕 Exploring the Motive of Conversation, events, who we are and how to heal from trauma... These are my words, from my soul, bound with hope, love and a willingness to share, to open the minds, hearts and souls of others ~ Hope - it’s the best and last of all things ~ The Motive

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